You are not at your best alone. Your own understanding is a pond. There is a ceiling and you cannot shatter it alone.
Yet, this is what I prefer. But my default comes with a hefty price. The opportunity cost of alone is relationships. What price for the knowledge I would have gained has I seemed relationships that built me up. What places could those friendship taken me?
My ignorance paid for selfishness. My default state of seeking a community of one, built a fortress keeping all out. This allowed me to just be able to relate to me. The muscle of relating to others was atrophied.
I have drawn a self portrait. In it, I have myself very good features. Now that I go back to it, I don’t necessarily recognize who is on the canvas.
I am not who I was meant to be by being alone. I was not to build a fortress, I was meant to foster a village. So, I must learn.
I have little talent of seeking community. That’s no excuse for not doing something with it. We are living things, we are meant to grow. And grow I must or I die.
Perhaps I have been dead for a while. Bigger miracles have happened. It is morning in my life. And I rise.